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We have finally arrived in Portugal! It is amazing how comfortable it feels already. This was meant to be. We are leasing in Mafra, with a view of the palace, until our place in Ericeira is finished. Here are a few ramblings on our path to becoming residents in this beautiful country.

When we first decided that Portugal was the nearly perfect place to retire, my mind went straight to business opportunities. Because the older I got the more illusive and less obtainable retirement seemed to become, I often have the tendency to seek out business opportunities before anything else.

Knowing that Portugal grows the most cork in the world, and has some amazing cork factories, I thought that I would set up a website for cork products. I usually start with a name first because words inspire me. Put a cork in it popped into my head.

Putacorkinit.com was taken already. GoDaddy offers suggestions when the name you want isn’t available. First on that list of suggestions was Putacorkinme.com. Put a cork in me? I don’t think so! Why would GoDaddy even suggest that? I hope that it was a random suggestion and not due to search algorithms from my browsing history.

Corkmania

I finally decided on Corkmania for the business that I will never pursue. Because I am retired, after all. And I’m pretty sure that I really, truly mean that. Anyway, I will meander back to the pros and cons of entrepreneurship, and my life as a compulsive entrepreneur, later in this blog. But first I would like to share some of our preparations in our final months, weeks, days and minutes before arriving here.

Packing – What to Take and What to Leave Behind

I have known people who have shipped containers from the U.S. to Portugal. I have shipped way too many containers in the past while in the import business. It is one thing to pack a container. That is relatively easy. However, it is quite another thing to unpack it, unwrap it, and find a place to store all your crap. I mean treasures. This time, we were determined to just take only the essentials. The rest would be either sold, given away or thrown away.

For international travel you are each allowed one check-in bag for free. The second one is $100. The third is $285. Our luggage fee was $485 for the two of us. Not cheap, but much cheaper and less hassle than shipping a container. Besides, it is hard to start a new life if you are bringing all of your old stuff.

Airline Baggage Limits are More than a Suggestion

Airlines allow 62 linear inches for each bag. But if you fill a 62 linear inch bag fully, you will go over their weight limit of 50 pounds (their limit used to be 70 pounds!). You will be penalized hundreds of dollars if you go over 50 pounds. Our four bags and one box (which was 18” x 18” x 24”, or 60 linear inches) were each over 50 pounds by one to four pounds.

Delta did give us leeway up to 52 pounds in case our own scale was off a bit. It wasn’t but I thought going over the weight limit by a few pounds was like driving a few miles over the speed limit. Apparently, that is not the case. The airlines are real hardasses these days. So we were there at check-in shifting a pound here and a pound there until each of our bags was between 51 and 52 pounds.

Collecting Our Bags in Portugal

We collected our four large 51 and 52 pound bags and one large 52 pound box at the baggage terminal. I was really hoping that we wouldn’t have to take everything apart on the other side of the pond at Portugal Customs. But as we were exiting the Lisbon airport, we zipped through the “Nothing to Declare” line without anyone giving us a second look.

However, our large box had been opened by Homeland Security in the U.S. and taped back together with official Homeland Security tape. They broke a couple of things (fortunately not my large desktop computer) and unscrewed our pepper grinder to check for contraband, without putting the screws back in.

Okay, I know what you’re thinking. Why would we take a pepper grinder as an essential when we are trying to get our baggage under the weight limit? Surely they have pepper grinders in Portugal. Well, not everything we packed was essential and this pepper grinder was so pretty that we hated to leave it behind.

I am currently typing on my keyboard which has silver powder all over it. I don’t know what Homeland Security dusted it with. Or why. But it won’t come off.

Sometimes Pubic Hair is Just a Figure of Speech

The language barrier here is not as bad as what I experienced in Thailand. I had a Thai friend who I had known for two years. His wife’s name was Moi so, naturally, I called her Moi. However, the Thai language has six tones, which means that one word can have six different meanings, depending on the tone you use. Learning words is hard enough but tones are nearly impossible.

After two years my friend took me aside and said, you know the way you pronounce Moi, it means pubic hair. It’s pronounced Moi, not Moi. My ears could hear no difference. All I could do was stop calling her by her name. But for two years I had called her Pubic Hair without anyone correcting me.

I have a similar problem here, although not as embarrassing. My friend’s name, João, is hard to pronounce. Until I learn how to pronounce it properly, I will not call him by his name.

Other Language Mishaps

I cheated my way through six years of Spanish in junior high and high school. About the only words that stuck with me, for whatever reason, were meatballs and library. If I ever have the opportunity to eat meatballs in a library in Spain, I will be in good shape. I am terrible at languages but I am going to give it the old college try. Although, truth be told, I did drop out of college after my first year.

My wife had a similar language mishap recently. Our landlord, whose name I didn’t know, was here with João, whose name I can’t pronounce. I asked our landlord to write down the address so that if I was out and about and needed an Uber then I would have a good address to give the driver.

My wife, not knowing that I had asked for the address, saw the piece of paper with Pedro on it and figured that he had written his name for us. When she posted their pictures on Facebook (because she thought they were so handsome), she named them as João and Pedro. Except that our landlord’s name is Hugo. Pedro was the street name. Everyone got a great laugh over that. The Portuguese do love a good joke, no matter at whose expense.

The Lemur

Since our last visit to Portugal, I had been in somewhat constant contact with João, our realtor friend here in Mafra.  He let us know that he and his wife would be in Madagascar for a few weeks before our arrival here. I asked him to bring me back a Lemur and he did! João wasn’t able to bring back a live one but it was the thought that counts. He also brought us a bottle of Quintas das Bageiras to make up for not bring us back a live Lemur.

If anyone reading this is interested in buying real estate in Mafra or Ericeira, I will put you in contact with João. I think you would be hard-pressed to find a better real estate agent.

A Bit More About Entrepreneurship

I know this is supposed to be a travel blog about becoming an expat in Portugal but we probably wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for two factors; my rollercoaster businesses and my wife’s steady paycheck as a teacher. Neither would have been enough to retire on but combined it worked out well enough.

Cathy became somewhat anesthetized by my businesses startups and exits. I love starting businesses but I hate the drudgery of running them for years on end. In other words, I get bored easily. My wife hated it every time I sold a business. But one has to recognize where ones strengths lie. Mine was in starting and selling small businesses. Not creating empires. We are not talking about Fortune 500 here. More what I would call nickel-dime businesses. Fortunately, nickels and dimes add up over time.

One thing that entrepreneurship does not necessarily provide is security. Entrepreneurs have no pension plan, no unemployment insurance, and no guarantees. Moods can greatly affect your income. If you have a regular job with a steady paycheck, you have a little more freedom to weather your mood cycles. The paychecks keep coming unless you are clinically depressed to the point of being unable to function.

Manic Depression and Its Repercussions

My worst business decisions always came during my manic stages. Those were the times when I was happiest and feeling so positive about everything that I just knew that nothing could fail. A bad idea could seem like a stroke of genius in those moments. But face it, a bad idea is just a bad idea. Or as my old junior high school coach used to say, you can’t make chicken salad out of chicken shit. He used to say a lot of stupid things, and I can’t remember what he was referring to when he said it (probably acknowledging my basketball skills) but that one stupid saying stuck with me.

Anyway, when I was depressed, I dug deep. An entrepreneur needs to dig so deep that it hurts. You have to burn your ships, like the Vikings supposedly did to theirs while pillaging new territories. That way, there would be no turning back. Those are the times when reality is staring you right in the face and choices and their consequences become crystal clear.

If it seems like I am discounting the popular notion that a positive attitude is all you need, while putting a positive spin on depression, well then… I guess that is just one of life’s Zen moments.

Luck is a very thin wire between survival and disaster, and not many people can keep their balance on it. – Hunter S. Thompson

One last thing about entrepreneurship. Never discount the element of luck. It plays a huge role in success or failure. That said, you will rarely get lucky if you are just sitting on your couch watching reruns of Gilligan’s Island. Spoiler alert! They get saved in the end.

I have to admit that I got “lucky” toward the end of my “career”. After losing big in the real estate crash of 2007-2008, and barely being able to crawl out of bed for six months because of it, I finally rolled up my sleeves and got back to work. I started a few businesses that I was able to sell for a profit and that pulled us back from the precipice. Fortunately, my wife was still bringing in a paycheck during that time. A few lucky breaks in business turned the tide for us. But that luck wouldn’t have happened if I hadn’t crawled out of bed.

This is the Creed that Entrepreneurs Need to Follow

“Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back– Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth that ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too.

All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamed would have come his way.

Whatever you can do, or dream you can do, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it. Begin it now.”

– Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe (1749–1832)

My 50^th High School Reunion

Beginning of next month is my 50^th high school reunion. We are flying to Ft Lauderdale to see old friends who I will not recognize without nametags. They have gotten so damn old!

I don’t know if I will write my next blog before or after the reunion. My commitment to myself is to post at least one blog a month. So if a calendar month goes by without a blog, please check in on me to see if I am still alive. I tried to keep this one short but I guess I had a lot to say this month.

Until next time…

My